Yes, I realize I am very late coming to this party, but ages after the film released to video I have finally gotten around to watching it. There was a combination of factors that resulted in me seeing Ocean’s 8 some eight months after its launch. On one hand life got in the way. But also, the first reviews I heard were pretty lackluster. And I can see why.

*Note: This review is filled with spoilers.

First, let me say I am a huge fan of the 2001 version of Ocean’s 11. I love nearly everything about the movie that I had no expectations for. I loved the heist. I loved the acting and in particular the way it was filmed. There was a great cohesion of costume choices, music, props and stage layout that really worked seamlessly together to create a great environment for the story. Everything worked together, so it felt unified and purposeful in design.

There are also some very classic scenes that stylistically are so interesting. For example, there is one scene with Danny Ocean (George Clooney) and Rusty Ryan (Brad Pitt) sitting in a bar. Danny is talking about the numbers of his crew for the heist and whether they need one more person. Rusty is flopped over the counter of the bar, with a glass of alcohol in one hand. The only reaction from Rusty in the entire scene is when he blinks his eyes. The interaction of these two characters suggests a history that monologues of words couldn’t convey in the same elegant fashion. It is these moments of quiet, mixed in with moments of banter and action that really add to the pacing.

While, Ocean’s 12 was not as much a favourite for me, I have come to greatly appreciate the experimentation that it took. Unfortunately, Ocean’s 13 demonstrated the film-makers didn’t really know what had caused 11 to be so successful (strong plot and excellent filming!) and as a result we get something that is watered-down and mostly boring. This is one of the biggest failings of Ocean’s 8. It is a paler version of a great movie. Here the film-makers knew that having one great heist with a twist was central. But they missed all the other stuff that elevated Ocean’s 11 into greatness.

I like the all female cast. I even like the basic premise of the heist. And the costumes, particularly for the MET gala were pretty awesome too. Unfortunately, the plot was shallow, the characters were one dimensional and the twist at the end was not cleaver so much as a cheat. If I was to describe the film in one word, it would like be: Flat. Everything was pretty boring, which is a shame when you have such a talented caste. The actors did not shine in this film, where the most interesting character is the Fence/Stay-at-home Mom, Tammy (Sarah Paulson). Debbie Ocean (Sandra Bullock) and Lou (Cate Blanchett) did not have great chemistry. They felt more like strangers than long time friends that understand how the other works. I know there is not enough time to develop every character in the crew, but surely they could have done more with Debbie and Lou.

The heist could have been interesting, but it wasn’t. There was never any real sense that things could go wrong. With a lack of stakes, it was difficult to become emotionally engaged. There was a lack of set up, which meant the big final twist was so unexpected I really felt cheated in the process. One of the great things about Ocean’s 11 is re-watching the movie knowing how the ending works. Doing this you can see all the little signs and clues of how things are really going to work. The first time you watch the heist, you are following the characters with great interest and anticipation. You think you know what is going on, you believe you are watching the heist play out. And when it looks like they are going to be caught – well, you are nervous as you should be. When the twist is revealed, you can look back over all those previous scenes and see how it fits together. This was cleaver filming and story telling. Unfortunately, Ocean’s 8 was not cleaver. It was bland. Roping in a character you never heard about in this film, to pull off a stunt that the characters expressly said they were not going to do – it was cheating, not smart story telling. Other’s may have thought it was cute to have the return of Yen (Shaobo Qin), but I thought it was disjointed. Two reasons, one Debbie makes a point of turning down men for this job. And two, it was like they were trying too hard to connect back with Ocean’s 11 instead of doing their own thing.

Also, the pacing felt off. Partly because you think you know when the ending is going to strike but then it keeps going. In concept, I don’t mind pushing the actual ending back further, but then de-escalate the importance of the heist. I also would have loved to see more of a set up with Claude Becker (Richard Armitage). This could have been way tenser if he seemed to be catching onto Debbie’s plan. Also, her revenge streak felt a little contrived. The writers needed to flesh out that plot line in more detail. They also should have show how much of a player/con Claude was throughout the film. Using him properly, they really could have upped the stakes during the heist.

I liked Daphne Kluger (Anne Hathaway) being in on the plot. I even like the idea that most of the crew would have no idea she was part of it. But I would have had her in from the beginning – because I can see how this could played for a good laugh. I think the most frustrating aspect of Ocean’s 8 is how they squandered what could have been a really good movie. They had some descent ideas, a fantastic caste and some wonderful costumes. They lacked depth of character, a unified presentation (in visual and musical design) and an intelligently filmed heist. I wished it was better, I wanted it to better. In the end it is a fine movie to watch on a plane or an evening when there is nothing else to do.