Well folks, it is nearing the end of June and the beginning of my Grand Adventure. I will shortly be flying off to Japan to soak up the cultural differences while pretending to teach English to children. It will be … different from my normal job. But this is post is not a speculation on what is to come in my uncertain future, rather it is (likely) my last book review – for a while at least. I don’t know how much I will be reading in Japan – nor do I know when I will once again be connected to the internet…
Book Cover – taken from the internet.
I digress. I placed my order over a week ago for a book entitled Charming by Elliott James. If I wasn’t so suspicious about the Main Branch of the Public Library, I should have known their reluctance in lending me the novel came not from malice but a desire to spare me the necessity of reading it. Charming is not a deliciously bad book, but is a long way from good.
My problem started early with the first person narrative. I am not fond of first persons who talk to their audience. I am not fond of lengthy exposition that is written in the most mundane manner.
John Charming was trained as a Knight to hunt and kill monsters from fairytale (and every other sort of mythical legend). Sadly, (for him) he was kicked out of his order when it became apparent John was also a werewolf (one of the abominations to be hunted). His name reflects his families link to all the Prince Charmings of Fairytales.The book begins with John working in a pub when a stunning blond and Vampire enter. The author tries way too hard to be cutesy with his quips, clichés and chapter titles. Sadly, the writing lacks enough depth to produce anything beyond bland.
The narrative commences with a bold declaration that all magic is real and around us we have just been spelled into not seeing it. As set ups go this is neither terrible nor original. Unfortunately, I have read better. Free Agent does a good job of the Fairytale world – playing with Fairy Godfathers (and Godmothers), wicked step-mothers, Charming Princes, the whole works. The world has everything – every monster, mythical creature and fey to have been imagined. As such, there is nothing defining about this world. It works very hard at being grounded in reality, while dealing solely with the supernatural aspects – a contradiction perhaps? There is nothing particularly wrong with writing about werewolves and vampires (besides being ubiquitous). I have certainly read any number of ridiculous supernatural fluff. Perhaps this is why I found Charming to lack any real charm.
As I said the world has anything and everything, so there was nothing original about it. The explanation for why we normal humans don’t see the supernatural is a bit silly. There is a spell woven over all humans to ignore anything that doesn’t fit with our conception of reality. A spell that is apparently breaking down, while the supernatural elements grow stronger around us. I have read explanations along similar veins before – some done more successfully. By picking up an urban fantasy, I am already committing to the idea that weird and unexplained things could be happening around me. I don’t need my author to explain why I haven’t actually seen any of this with my own to eyes – it detracts from the story and breaks my suspension of disbelief. In fact the author has just done the opposite of his intended – he has made me even more aware of how ridiculous his world is.
Many people would surely enjoy the very light, mindless read that is Charming. I thought it would be good fun. Instead I found myself working at finishing the book (and skimming more and more as I rushed towards the promised end). Not surprisingly this is book one and as you can guess from my lack lust review, I will not be looking for the next novel in the series.
Oh, two this of interest did cross my mind as I was reading. 1) Apparently there is a lot of interest in old Norse mythology as the Blond was yet another Valkyrie to pop up in my readings. 2) The author really is fascinated by women’s hips as a defining physical character trait (at least for the first few females we meet).